


picking up the broken pieces

by radiantgem



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Humor, when will kh3 come out so these two can meet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-27
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-22 08:14:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13162896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radiantgem/pseuds/radiantgem
Summary: He stared at his hands. His hands brought upon so much destruction, so much so that even when he feels like he’s doing a pretty good job rebuilding and fixing the mess he made, he gets a reminder of the things he can’t fix. The people he can’t save. All because he didn’t care about what the darkness held for him, not even sparing a second thought about how it would affect other people. He knew there were risks, but he didn’t care and did it anyway.“I know it doesn’t fix the things I did. And I’m not asking or expecting your forgiveness but I just-” He took a deep breath and met Terra’s gaze. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I failed you.”





	picking up the broken pieces

**Author's Note:**

> I take a theory that says Terra's memories are inside the Lingering Will while Terranort doesn't remember anything, but his heart does recognize people and will act accordingly to who they are, even if he doesn't remember their name. This is kinda touched upon in the beginning.
> 
> Also, Ventus doesn't really appear in this fic, but he's still technically present. You'll know what I mean if you squint in the beginning.

“How long do you think they’ve been in there?”

“Dunno, it’s been a while. Can’t really blame them for taking their time though.” Riku crossed his arms. “Hopefully Naminé’s magic worked.”

“I’m sure it did. This is Naminé we’re talking about!” Sora leaned against his folded arms behind his head. “I can’t even imagine though, being separated for that long.”

“Me either.” Riku lightly shook his head. “A year is long enough.”

“I’ll say.” Sora smiled, although it didn’t reach his eyes. Although Riku knew he must have been thinking about the time he spent after he woke up looking for him, he couldn’t help but feel like there was something else bothering Sora. Recently there were moments where Sora would act. . . different. When he first met Aqua, he practically yelled her name and almost pounced on her out of excitement before he caught himself and awkwardly apologized for his actions.

_“I don’t know what came over me, I didn’t even realize what I was doing,” he had said, scratching his cheek sheepishly. Aqua didn’t look offended at all, if anything, she looked almost wistful. She had smiled and told him, “After all these years, and you’re still a spitting image of Ven,” and gave Sora a warm hug. Sora had shyly wrapped his arms around her, and Riku could see him rapidly blinking his eyes, something he did whenever he tried to hold back from crying._

It was odd enough the first time, the second time he caught him acting weird, it was when they had found Terra. That time however, was much harder to tell if it was something else, or just Sora being sensitive to the situation. The reunion was emotional on Aqua’s end, considering it had been over ten years since she had last seen him in the flesh. Terra had been moved by the reunion as well, and to see a man such as himself, his childhood hero , openly cry, he couldn’t blame Sora for getting emotional by what happened. No one could have predicted the slap in the face everyone felt when Terra revealed he had lost his memory. The heartache was palpable in the air, and even though he knew Sora to be the one who wore his heart on his sleeve, he wasn’t expecting to see the look of absolute devastation on his face.

Sora’s foot mindlessly tapping against the floorboards broke him out of his train of thought, and as he looked down at him, he saw a trace of something playful appear in his eyes. “So, are you excited?”

Riku quirked an eyebrow. “Excited? About what?”

“About meeting Terra!” Sora’s grin turned smug. “You know, your _hero_.”

“My _what_? He was not-”

Sora waved him off. “Oh please. Don’t even bother denying it from me, tough guy. You used to draw pictures of him and hide them under your bed.”

Riku could feel his ears starting to burn. “You _snooped_ around my room?!”

“Uh? Yeah? You didn’t wanna tell me what was up when he came, and acted all weird for the next few days. So _obviously_  I had to investigate to see what was up, it was completely necessary!”

Riku dragged a hand across his head as he groaned. “Why am I friends with you again?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s my boyish charm.” Sora batted his eyes innocently, and yelped when Riku wrapped his arm around his neck, and gave him a noogie. “Hey! Let go!” Despite his protests, he didn’t make any motion to actually break free of Riku’s hold, and just broke out in laughter.

“Nah, I feel like this is completely necessary, and way overdue for what you did.” He tried to come off as serious as he could, but Sora’s laughter was contagious, and he couldn’t help a grin from growing on his face.

“Is everything okay here boys?” Aqua had just exited the room and closed the door behind her. She had an amused smile on her face.

Riku immediately let go of his hold on Sora and stood up straight in her presence. Although she didn’t demand as much authority as Master Yen Sid did, he has seen how powerful her magical prowess is in the battlefield first hand. When he took into account the large amount of time she spent endlessly fighting in the Realm of Darkness, while he was impressed with her capability to survive that long, to say he wasn’t a little bit intimidated was an understatement. He noticed the somewhat disapproving looks she gave him whenever he used darkness in his attacks, although she was kind enough to not treat him any different outside of the battlefield. Regardless, she was someone he wanted to stay on her good side. Besides, she did sacrifice her chance to leave to protect him. The least he could do was give her the utmost respect, which was a major accomplishment for him according to Sora (whatever that meant).

“Er- sorry Master Aqua. Everything’s fine.”

“You look pretty happy Aqua,” Sora beamed. “Did Naminé’s magic work? Does he remember everything now?”

Aqua gave him a warm smile. The light in her eyes that would only flicker every now and then was burning bright. She looked less like the battle scarred warrior he knew her to be, and more human with her hopeful eyes and relaxed stance. “I am, Sora. Terra’s memory isn’t perfect right now, but he remembers me and Ven. That’s enough, for now. As time goes on he will remember more of his memories.” Her smile faded a bit, “For better or for worse.”

Riku slightly frowned. He had learned about Xehanort taking control of his body and the battle that ensued between the two. Aqua had told him that whenever Terra got the upperhand, he would try to aid her with whatever power he had left, and fought from the inside. Whether that meant releasing her from Xehanort’s chokehold, taking temporary control to attack the Guardian, and giving her a clear opening to put an end to him, he did whatever he could to avoid hurting her.  He felt lingering guilt fester in his heart as he recalled his past, how he had attacked Sora when he was unarmed. How he was the one who opened the door to the heart of Destiny Islands and made it fall to darkness. And for what? To prove he wasn’t afraid? To prove he was strong? Meanwhile, on the other side of the door was the man who entrusted him with the power to use the keyblade in the first place. The man who did absolutely nothing but try to protect his friends, even when everything, from his home to his whole body, was being taken away from him.

He had taken the Mark of Mastery exam in the hopes of finding out whether or not he was truly ready to wield the keyblade. And while he has worked overcome his feelings of unworthiness, there was still a part of him he had a hard time forgiving. He knew he had grown from the selfish jerk he had been in the past, but that didn’t change the things he had done.

_Nothing ever will._

“Anyway, Naminé did a splendid job putting his memory back together, and he’s well enough to accept any visitors. If you want, you can go on and meet him, er, again, I suppose in Riku’s case.” Aqua gave him a grin. “I’m sure he would love to see how much you’ve grown since you last met.”

Riku blinked. He felt his feet glued to the floor, and he was pretty sure his brain short-circuited. “Uh-”

“Of course Riku would love to meet Terra again!” Sora not-so-subtly bumped his arm with his shoulder with enough force to make him stumble in his place. “I would meet him too, but I wanna give Riku his moment ya know? With him being his childhood he-”

Riku slapped his hand over Sora’s mouth as he tried to save whatever was left of his dignity. “Sure, it’d be cool to see him again. I’ll go inside right now.” Riku gave Sora a pointed look as he let go of his hold. Sora’s eyes glinted with a mixture of mischievousness and excitement as he gave off a small chuckle. “Don’t you dare try anything.”

Sora gave a faux-innocent whistle. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

It was Aqua’s soft laugh that ended the banter between the two boys. It wasn’t often that she laughed, and he always felt a little pride flutter in his chest whenever the two of them were able to get one out of her.

“You two are so silly.” Aqua shook her head in a fond manner as she walked over to them. He saw her reach both of her hands out and automatically bowed his head a bit towards her as she put a hand on both his and Sora’s head. Sora laughed a little at the show of affection. Riku closed his eyes and couldn’t help his lips tugging into a shy smile.

“I’d like to thank you two again, for everything that you’ve done for me. You’ve made an old woman happy.” Aqua said with a playful look in her eye.

“Aw, it’s nothing.” Sora grinned.

“I think you’ve got a few more years ahead of you.” Riku stood up straight and gave her a genuine smile. “And don’t mention it, it’s the least I could do after you saved me.”

Aqua softly scoffed. “As if I’d just let those heartless get to you on my watch. Now go on inside, Naminé and him should be almost done catching up by now.”

“Right, thank you.” Riku slightly bowed to her before he walked to the door and went inside.

His foot accidentally nudged one of the pieces of discarded armor that littered the floor, and the sound of it brought Terra and Naminé’s attention to him. He raised his hand awkwardly to the two, embarrassed of his entrance.

“Oh! Riku! I should get going now,” Naminé looked back at Terra with a shy smile. “It was nice meeting you, Terra.”

“The pleasure is all mine.” Terra gave her a warm smile as he reached over and ruffled her head lightly. Naminé flinched in surprise before letting out a giggle. “Be good alright? I hope to see you again soon kiddo.”

Naminé nodded eagerly as she stood up. “I will, don’t worry. I’ll see you soon.” She briefly waved at him before turning away towards Riku. As she walked to the doorway, she briefly placed her hand on his arm and gave it an encouraging squeeze. She must have felt his nervous energy, and he gave her hand a grateful pat. When the door had closed behind him, let himself take a deep breath as he raised his eyes to Terra’s form on the bed. He flinched a bit to see Terra already staring at him, his eyes squinting at his form, as if he was searching for someone he used to know.

“H-hey. I mean, it’s good to see you again, sir.” Riku awkwardly walked over near the bedside.

Terra tilted his head, his eyes still searching Riku’s. “You look so familiar, but I can’t put my finger on it. Please, sit down.”

Terra continued to squint at him as he made his way over to the wooden chair near his bedside.

“Sorry, but my memory isn’t all there yet. Can you remind me who you are?”

“Oh, I don’t think I ever told you my name but, my name is Riku. I’m the boy you met in the islands, the one you gave the power of the keyblade to.”

Terra’s eyes slowly started to flicker with recognition. “The boy from the island. . .” His eyebrows raised to his hairline as his eyes widened with shock. “No, you’re-you’re the one I chose! But you look so much-” He cut himself off before running a hand through his hair.

“Older?” Riku smiled a little. “It’s been a long time since then.”

Terra sighed, his eyes looking far away as he stared off into the distance. “Yes. Aqua warned me about how much time had passed since then, but it didn’t really hit me until now.” His eyes became present again when he grinned at Riku. “Look at how much you’ve grown, the young man you’ve become.”

Riku could feel his ears start to burn. He wasn’t used to this sort of sincere recognition.

“Now that I think about it, Aqua told me that you and Mickey were the ones who saved her out of the Realm of Darkness. For that, you have my thanks.” He reached out and squeezed his shoulder. “And that you’ve already achieved the title as ‘Master’.” Terra’s beamed with a sort of pride one would find in a parent over their child’s accomplishments. “You’ve made me very proud, _Master_ Riku. I’m glad I chose you all those years ago.”

Riku could only blink at everything Terra had said. It was a little overwhelming to receive all this praise and recognition from the man who was his hero for so long. He felt those lingering feelings of guilt flare up again as he saw the immense pride in Terra’s eyes. He didn’t deserve this kind of praise. Not after everything he did.

Riku shook his head lightly. “No, I-I don’t deserve this.”

Terra’s eyebrows furrowed together in a confused manner. “What do you mean?”

Riku hung his head low, unable to look at his hero in the face as he felt shame warm his pale cheeks. “I-I abused the power you gave me. I didn’t use it for the reasons you would have wanted me to use it for. I was selfish and only wanted to prove that I was strong, even if that meant destroying things, even if that people would get hurt as a result of my actions.” Fragments of memories flashed through his head. Memories that he tried to push down.

_You hated being an islander._

**_Shut up._ **

_So you opened the door to darkness and destroyed the islands. It was YOU._

Riku gripped onto the fabric of his jeans as he felt a ball form in his throat. He remembered when he first came back to the islands with Sora and Kairi, hearing about the people who disappeared on the night the island fell to darkness. The people who never came back. He was the one responsible for their disappearances. He knew they didn’t just disappear. They were gone. And it was his fault.

He stared at his hands. His hands brought upon so much destruction, so much so that even when he feels like he’s doing a pretty good job rebuilding and fixing the mess he made, he gets a reminder of the things he can’t fix. The people he can’t save. All because he didn’t care about what the darkness held for him, not even sparing a second thought about how it would affect other people. He knew there were risks, but he didn’t care and did it anyway.

“I know it doesn’t fix the things I did. And I’m not asking or expecting your forgiveness but I just-” He took a deep breath and met Terra’s gaze. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I failed you.”

He couldn’t read Terra’s expression, nor did his eyes give away any sign of an emotion Riku could recognize. He felt his nails dig into his skin as his anxiety coursed through his body, letting his gaze falter back to his hands. The tension in the room was suffocating him, and he couldn’t bear to look at Terra’s face again. He didn’t want to see the disappointment, the anger he must have felt from knowing his gift was misused in his hands.

“Riku.”

Riku flinched at his name, but still didn’t look up to Terra.

Terra spoke in a much more careful and gentle tone. “Hey, come on kiddo. I’m not angry.” As if to emphasize his point, Terra reached out again and placed his hand on Riku’s shoulder and squeezed lightly.

Riku’s eyes shot upward to look at Terra in disbelief. True to his word, Terra’s face did not give away any signs of anger. Instead, there was a look of understanding, and maybe flickers of regret in his eyes. “But-but how? Why?”

Terra sighed as he placed his hand back to his lap.  “I’m not angry, and I mean it. But I am disappointed in what has happened, and that I couldn’t do anything to prevent it. I can’t scold you for it either, since I don’t exactly have a right to do that. Considering the things I’ve done.” Terra looked down and shook his head lightly. “This all could have been avoided.”

Riku’s voice wavered slightly as he saw the remorse hang on Terra’s shoulders. “That’s not true, you didn’t even do any of those things! That was Xehanort’s doing, you didn’t even have control over your body!” Riku placed a hand over his chest. “I _knew_ what I was doing could hurt other people-- could hurt my friends-- and I did it anyway. You just wanted to protect them.”

Terra’s eyes widened in surprise at Riku’s outburst before letting an appreciative smile take over his face. “That might be true, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t make mistakes along the way, before my body was taken away from me. I shoudn’t have walked away from Aqua and Ventus. I should have listened to what Ven had to say. Maybe if I had done that, things would have gone differently.” Terra looked at Riku with a gentle but stern expression. “We both made mistakes, mistakes that aren’t easy to clean up. And regardless if you did willingly go astray at one point, I know your heart is in the right place. Especially now, after all the things you’ve done to prove yourself.”

From the gentle yet understanding tone of Terra’s voice, Riku felt his shoulders release their tense grip from him as he let out a relieved sigh. It made things a little easier, knowing Terra wasn’t the perfect hero Riku grew up him imagining to be. It made him more human, and much easier to communicate with, knowing they weren’t so different after all. “Thank you, sir, really.” Riku bowed his head in the hopes his words weren’t enough to show his sincerity.

Terra chuckled softly. “Please, don’t bow like that. It makes me feel old.”

Riku let out a huff of laughter. “ _Well-_ ”

“Don’t remind me.” Terra said with an exasperated smile, but his eyes glittered with amusement and something youthful. “And please, just call me Terra.”

“As long as you just call me Riku. I’m still not used to the whole ‘Master’ title.” Riku scratched his head lightly. “I don’t feel ready for others to refer to me as that, not yet anyway.”

Terra nodded in understanding. “That’s totally fine, Riku.”

There was a soft knocking at the door that caught both of their attention, and when Riku turned his head around, he saw Aqua poking her head inside with an apologetic smile. “Sorry to interrupt boys, but I wanted to know how much longer you needed. Sora wants to know, he’s really itching to meet him.”

Riku rolled his eyes, but it came off as fond instead of annoyed. “Of course.” He muttered to himself. “Tell him we’re almost done. I’m just about to leave.”

Aqua chuckled a little and nodded. “Will do.”

Once the door closed, Riku turned his attention to Terra to see him grinning at him. “Sora is the same boy you were friends with all those years ago, right?”

Riku nodded. “Yup, same one. For better or for worse. ”

Terra gave him an amused smile. “It’s good to have real friends like him, ones who stick around no matter what.”

“Yeah, I know.” Riku gave him a small smile. “Well, it was really great to meet you again Terra.”

Terra smile grew. “It was great to see you again too. Hopefully, we’ll get to see each other again once I’m fully recovered. Maybe even fight together in a mission.”

Riku’s jaw dropped. “You-you really mean that?”

“Of course! That is, if you want to do that.”

Riku felt a bubbly sort of satisfaction rumble in his chest. He couldn’t hide the excitement the prospect gave him, and he didn’t really care. He eagerly nodded and gave him his most enthusiastic smile. “I would be honored.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments/kudos are always appreciated! :)


End file.
